March 10, 2025

I want to unpack some of the things I did today. I woke up at 11:30 this morning. I had taken appetite stimulants the night before to boost my appetite. They made me feel drowsy, so I feel asleep at around 7 pm the night before. I didn't expect to sleep so much. Even though sleeping so much may be considered lazy, I don't regret it. I think my body needed it. I bought some groceries. I went to the gym. The gym was nearly empty because of Spring Break. Traffic was light for the same reason. I did posture exercises. I am trying to correct my anterior pelvic tilt and rounded shoulders.

I was watching a clip from a motivational speaker today. A quote from what he said stood out to me. He said "There's a moment when every boy realizes no one is coming to save him. And that's when he becomes a man. And some boys never get there and stay children forever." It hit me like a freight train. Yes, its true. Only I and I alone can save myself. It's so fucking easy to wait and wait and wait and hope that things will magically get better. They won't. The only person who can change my life is me. I accept full responsibility and take complete accountability. And the only way to truly get better is to suffer. And the pain will hurt like a motherfucker. But, its true. I have to forge myself in fire. There are no shortcuts or hacks. Shortcuts and hacks will only bite me in the ass later.